Target Practice

Oh man, what a freaking ORDEAL I can be right now.
We went to Target after work tonight. Let me start this by saying that I have a love/hate relationship with Target in the first place. We frequent Target on a very regular basis...and it's where I had many a painful shopping trips pre-surgery. I would have to use a shopping cart to lean on it and walk through the store. I always love it there, but I just would get so tired and discouraged.

Anyway, I digress. Tonight. We went after work because there were many sales we wanted to hit and we had a gift card as well. I decided to use a scooter (much to my dismay), since we had a lot to do and using the crutches for that long is just not bearable. Well, the scooters were all tucked in between the express registers in the smallest possible place. I had to squeeze into the "parking space" to try and get onto it. When I finally got ONTO the scooter...I then had to unplug it. The scooter was plugged in underneath the register...not even within arms length. Can someone explain to me how much sense that makes? I had to get back out, hop over, climb underneath the register, unplug it, climb out, and then hop back. I finally got back on the scooter, get my crutches in it with me and pull it out and into the main walkway. We went about 30 feet....and the battery died. Sigh.

At that point I really just wanted to call it a day, I was exhausted and we hadn't even started yet.

 I had to get out of the scooter (again), and hubby had to push it back to its original resting position. The scooters wheels didn't work after the battery died...so this made a HUGE raucous. After a couple minutes of hubby wrestling with this $%#^\# thing, the Target employee ringing at the register next to us finally called over the speaker "Customer Service to the express lanes, please."

He did get in back into the spot just as someone came over. Then he had to crawl under the register to plug it back in so the next poor, unsuspecting fool doesn't go through the same thing. The nice Target lady helped me pick another scooter, and then even unplugged it and pulled out of the sardine can it was parked in. Splendid. She ended the conversation by saying she'd be happy to hold my crutches in back while I shopped so I didn't have to lug them with me. I loved her.

It's an interesting experience, riding one of those things in a highly populated store. You get many different reactions. You get the children who give you the LASER STARE. You get some people who really feel bad for you and go WAY out of their way to be nice and help you. You get the people who avoid you like the plague. And THEN you get the majority reaction, which is the "What the hell is a perfectly healthy looking 20-something doing in that scooter? This isn't a play place, people really need those things!" I hate those looks. I wish I could wear a sign that says: "I've had two big hip surgeries in the past 5.5 months!" Believe me people, if I didn't need that scooter, I WOULDN'T be in it. These are the same people that give me dirty looks when we park in the handicap spots. I want to tells every one of them: "Hey listen, I'm healing and I've earned these necessary perks. I've got 4 surgical screws to prove it!"

Anyway, while routing about Target I only hit about a dozen end caps...one I nailed so hard I pulled the shelving right out. Which is remarkable because the scooter was so slow there were times I thought I was actually going backwards. Hubby walked behind me and cleaned up my mess, as usual.

The end of our trip ended with as much cluster as the beginning. Hubby had purchased a large bookshelf, and he needed a Target employee to help him get it in car. Meanwhile, a very friendly Customer Service lady came over with my cructhes and started making a big fuss over me...which I hate. " Are you okay waiting here on the scooter? Your husband can pull the car right up, I'll wait with you. Oh no, dear, don't get up until you absolutely have to. You just rest and we'll take care of everything." Great.

Hubby pulls the car up and spends the next fifteen minutes like Capernicus trying to figure out how to get this <}%{£|! bookshelf in the witty bitty Jetta. Aye aye aye. Anyway, the moral of the story is....I am just a mega-hassle right now. I think we'll keep the trips to a minimum.

Talk soon,
D